what matters?

for all those days when i just feel like giving up
just feel like sitting still, unmoving
staring at nothing, staring through everything
feeling it all bounce off you just trying to keep it out
trying to keep it in
creating the balance to keep up the facade
listen to the songs that make me feel nothing, no thinking, no trying
crying because i dont know what happened
when did i change
when did it get so hard
and i think to myself; what matters?